Press start or something I don't fucking know ★ "The proof is in the pudding" - Bill Cosby ★ Your mom so ugly Metallica had a benefit concert for her. ★ "Guns are for sissies, real men nunchuck" - Ip Man ★ Scientists have recently discovered that hell is approximately 1 billion times bigger than previously estimated. ★ Yo mama such a hoe she went on The Price Is Right and the other contestants started bidding on her. ★ Don't sit in parking lots in front of jiujitsu dojos with binoculars for too long. ★ If anyone ever calls you a trife ass hoe just remember that you are rubber and splooge is glue, get out the way or become the splooge too. ★ The next Purge movie will take place inside an IKEA. ★ I guess you can take animals into stores now but like shutting the fuck up at the library should still be a thing. ★ Walmart Nirvana T-shirts are for posers. ★ Hitler's favorite band is Hanson. ★ This transmission was not brought to you by Crouching Tiger Hidden Valley Ranch. ★ Feed your mom Gluten-free Scooby Snacks. ★ Johnny Depp sucks at acting like he can play guitar. ★ "Don't wink your butt hole at strangers" - Phone Losers ★ Online bullying people with morse code is forbidden. ★ Yo momma so fat she was in a TV show and her character died but the closed captions said (breathing heavily). ★ Bust a Nut Cheerios is part of a complete breakfast. ★ When it comes to take it or leave it i always leave it. ★ Boycott zoos, put the animals back!! ★ Tattoo idea: a silhouette of Michael Jordan passing the ball to somebody else. ★ Honey, I Shrunk My Penis - rated R coming soon to theaters. ★ Pandemic panic shopping is the new Black Friday. ★ If you've ever finger banged your cousin while your uncle watched, you might be Jeff Foxworthy. ★ Bob Barker is now in hell repeatedly experiencing being spayed and neutered. ★ Did you support a friend's band that didn't go anywhere? You may be entitled to a cash refund settlement. Call Osborn and Goldberg now. ★ Enough about cancel culture, i wanna hear more about do something charitable but film yourself doing it culture. ★ "John Wayne is just a little bitch" - Bruce Lee ★ I wanna be Michael Jackson during nose surgery for Halloween. ★ There should be a Ouiji computer game where multiple people put their hands on a computer mouse and push it back and forth. ★ The first person ever to hurt themselves by running with scissors is getting a Tosh.0 web redemption. ★ Isn't it ironic on another level if Alanis Morissette cut the cheese after she just cut you in line? ★ I hope they never name a tree or body of water after Justin Timberlake. ★ Death by unquenchable maple syrup craving. ★ Weather Report: Looks like we're in for some nasty leather. ★ If i had a low rider i would just hop over wrong way spikes. ★ Wanda Sykes has been impersonating her self her entire life ★ Justin Bieber should star in a bio pic about Vanilla Ice, then I would have two reasons not to watch it. ★ The Southern National Institute For Farts, otherwise known as SNIFF. ★ Yo mama so nasty she needs Left Guard too. ★ Wu-tang is the new walmart Nirvana tshirt. ★ Introducing the new Spice Girl... Karen Spice. ★ Vin Diesel's favorite restaurant is the Olive Garden. ★ Do squirls and rabbits hangout or are they like fuck you bitch? ★ I've never been to a pandemic panic shopping event at a store before but if i ever do it will just be to drop a bag of marbles. ★ I just realized my used couch that I bought on craigslist was in a porno. hashtag scrublife. ★ Foreskin Mask - Rated R. ★ So does Butthead have gingivitis or what's going on with that? ★ If you've never been invited to an intervention it means you're part of the problem. ★ Alexa, what is the past tense form of Gettin Jiggy Wit It? ★ We're talking mad shit about your mom all day long here on Lame-Over.com